Kikyo's Painful Memories
by Mireou
Summary: We all know how Kagome feels but we nevr stop to think about Kikyos feelings. She lost her sister, Inuyasha, her life. She believed to be betrayed by her only love. Nothing turned out as it was suppose to.
1. Kikyos Painful Memories

Summary: How Kikyo feels about her life. And about her love.

Disclaimer: Song, Bring Me Back To Life, by Evanessence. Characters in this story belong to Rumiko Takahashi.

**How can you see into my eyes  
Like open doors.**

_He made me think that I had a chance at life... at a _normal _life... His eyes bore so deep in me... I felt loved for the first time in so long... _Cared _for... _Normal_... Will I ever feel that way again?_

**Leading you down into my core  
Where I've become so numb.**

He's betrayed me. _At first I thought it was him who gave me my mortal wounds but then I learned the truth. It was Naraku. The Onigumo that I had taken care of was to weak to fight off the attraction that being a demon brings. But when I came back he betrayed me anyway... _With her_... Ive decided that not caring will make the pain go away..._

**Without a soul  
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold  
Until you find it there and lead it back home.**

I cant forget about him..._ Try as I might he still seeps into my very being. We do not belong of this world. I have to help him see that... But why! _Why does he choose her over me? _After all, Ive loved him so much... Will my spirit ever be awakened? Will it ever be _free

****

(wake me up)  
Wake me up inside.

(wake me up)Wake me up inside. 

_Only he can wake me up again... _

**(I can't wake up)  
Wake me up inside.**

_I need no other..._

**(Save me)  
Call my name and save me from the dark.**

_No... dont call my name... I do not deserve to live. I do not _want _to live... _not in a fake body

**(Wake me up)  
Bid my blood to run.**

_There is no blood coursing through me... only betrayal. Pain. _Misery

**(I can't wake up)  
Before I come undone.**

I can feel myself falling_... Its like a deep abyss that I will not be able to escape. Its so cold... and dark. I cant see a thing but I wish you were here_... I always wish you were here...

**Save me.  
(Save me from the nothing I've become.)**

You were the one I turned to for saving... _I had been the protector for so long that I need my own protection... Against myself. It had made me cold and you thawed me out... made me whole_. I can never forgive you for that... It made me weak and I payed the price with my life. _And yet, I cannot bring myself to hate you.  
_  
**Now that I know what I'm without  
You can't just leave me.**

Im am without my soul. _Instead it has been taken from my and placed inside this girl. And yet you do not wish that it return to me? You do not wish to be reunited? Sometimes my soul still burns with the hate of betrayal and it is in that time that I realise what I am without_... I am without you...

**Breathe into me and make me real  
Bring me to life.**

_I do not deserve to live... I do not even wish it. _I only wish to be free...

**Bring me to life.  
I've been living a lie**

Ive lied so much. _Everytime I said I hated him, I was lying. _Does that make me a bad person?

There's nothing inside.  
Bring me to life.

I am clay and bones. I am a monster. _I have destroyed things lower than I, and yet I let myself live? There is nothing inside of me. Nothing left of that love that I once felt for you so strongly. It is gone in me because _I can see it gone in you. _You have fallen for another and have left me to die. I am grateful that you can forgive so easily where as I can not.  
_  
**Frozen inside without your touch,  
Without your love, darling.  
Only you are the life among the dead.**

_You treated me like I was normal but now?_ Now we are destined to fight. _You use to love me and now we try to kill each other? Destiny is ironic and has a cruel humor to place us in such a position. I am dead. You are living. We have no place left for one another... _That fact alone kills me.

All of this sight  
I can't believe I couldn't see  
Kept in the dark  
But you were there in front of me

_While I was dead it seemed like an eternal blackness but then I saw a light. _That light was you. _My soul stayed by you while you were pinned to that tree. It was in hatred _but it was also in love. _Then it was forced to leave to be reincarnated into the girl that would eventually replace me and I was no longer here. _Ironic to say the least. 

I've been sleeping a 1000 years it seems.  
I've got to open my eyes to everything.

_It was 50 years that we were seperated. _But it seems longer_. I loved you but in that moment that I thought you betrayed me I was hurt. I had never felt such pain before and it quickly turned to anger. _Anger at myself for getting to close to another and at you, for taking advantage of me_. That was how I use to feel. And I guess I still kinda do... _because of that girl...

Without a thought

I want you back...

Without a voice

I need to know you still love me, and only me.

Without a soul

My soul longs for nothing else...

Don't let me die here  
There must be something wrong.  
Bring me to life.

_I shouldnt be alive. This reality is a hoax and I belong in this world no longer. But for some reason..._ my soul is hesitant to give up on you...

Bring me to life.  
I've been living a lie  
There's nothing inside.

Inuyasha... _only you can bring me back to life again... only you..._

Bring me to life

I long for you, my Inuyasha...


	2. Thank you

I just want to say thanks to all of those who gave me reviews. Since this was my first I was really excited that people liked it. So far I havent got many but it hasnt been out for long so hopefully more have read it by now. This one was short so in the future I might try for a longer one but untilt hen Ill be doing short stories with songs attached. I hope to get on of each character. My plan is to make it so people dont hate one character because of another or some stupid reason like that. Sure, there are evil characters out there but they all have their reasons for the things they did and I hope to clear this stuff up. I hope for more reviews and I thank you who helped me out. Im always looking for inspiration and even critisicm so dont hold back!


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